Well I always wanted to write something like this but I never did. So my my writing assignment I am going to.

I have no clue where I'm going with what I wrote so far, but right now in the story I'm looking at old pictures P:.

(Here)

Looking at old pictures, I saw how happy I was. I had no clue what was going on around me. I had no clue what my family was hiding, but now I now know. I know now that my life was never perfect. My life is far from perfect. I miss the days when everyone was together, when I thought everyone was happy, but nothing lasts forever.

When I was little, my father was still around, and my mother still put up with his crap. I thought everything was perfect. I never noticed the fighting, or the tears in her eyes. My only concern was getting Elmo back on the television. My father still drove me to school every morning in his blue van, said I love you each time I got out of the car. Too bad they were all lies. When I started actually started to notice the fighting, I thought it would go away, but it never did. I miss when I thought everything was perfect.

I ripped up the picture of my father and me. I picked up the next picture in the small pile I had on my bed.

It was of my mother and me hugging each other. I was about nine. Before I knew what she was really like. Before I knew that she was an alcoholic. Before I knew she was insane. Before I knew that she really wasn’t my best friend. Before I knew that one day she would be dead to me too. Inside I know I love her, but she make it hard for me to show those feelings because of the way she acts. She has caused so much harm, she is trying to change, but she still acts the same. She makes it so hard for me to forgive her.

I remember that one night, when I was laying in her bed. In a attempt to have a conversation with me, she told me about the story when I was still in her belly. She told me that she never wanted me; she told me that she did everything in her power not to have me, she made me feel worthless. I cried myself to sleep that night, and I always think about what she said, what I did wrong, but I could never come up wit an answer. I have asked myself those questions since I was ten years old.

I tore the picture a little. My relationship with my mother will always be there, but it will never be the same as it was.

The next picture was of my three siblings and me at my brother, Jim’s wedding. He married Val, who I have known since I was born, so I consider her my sister, but she wasn’t in that photo. I was so happy for my brother that day, but I was so afraid that I wouldn’t see him as much as I used to, but know I know that I really didn’t have anything to worry about. I see him every weekend. I and my three siblings, Aly, Brian, and Jim were my father and mother figures. When my parents were incapable of taking care of me they did. They were all I had. We all used to be so close until my brother, Brian, got a girlfriend. She was all he cared about, and forgot about my brother, sister, and me. I didn’t want to see him get hurt, but I also didn’t want him to leave me. Brian and I were always very close. We did everything together, but that all changed. No one liked Rosa, but we had to deal with her because if we wanted Brian in our lives, we had to have her too.

I ripped the picture of all four of us in half, which made two halves of me separate. My two brothers don’t talk to each other anymore, and it destroyed me. They are apart of me, and the relationship I once had with Brian is never the same.